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Being the cool lofes means you embrace one-night stands and almost relationships, even when the only thing you want is a serious relationship.

It means you change your desires to fit whatever your man wants at the time.

Impressing him becomes the most important thing in the world because his view of you matters more than the real you. His happiness matters more than your comfort.

Being lves cool girl means you spend hours on your appearance — tweezing and contouring and blending — but you act like it only took you two seconds to get ready. You act like you naturally look like you just stepped off the cover of a magazine, because if you admitted it took work to look that way, men would call you high maintenance.

But if you stopped putting in the work, they would call you lazy. You welcome it.

Being the cool girl means you never get angry, even when you have every right to scream your lungs out or give the silent treatment. Because adding confrontation to the relationship risks ending the relationship, and you would rather carry on pretending to be happy than slip your heart onto your sleeve and act authentic.

You like all of the same things he likes. You want to do all of the things he wants to do.

Girly enough to look good, but not girl enough that it becomes annoying. Being the cool girl means that you are only half yourself at any given time.

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It means you are pretending to be the imaginary woman that men like to pretend exist. Because they would rather hold out lovex a cool girl who gives them the freedom to fuck around than be with someone who calls them out on their bullshit and actually expects them to put in an equal amount of effort.

Being the cool girl fucks you over, because you never get a chance to be yourself. They exist because of the bullshit expectations placed on us. Holly is the author of Severe d: A Creepy Poetry Collection.

You just have to show up and try. Focus on the most immediate thing in front of you.

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